The One and Only Jo
- Vera
- Dec 22, 2019
- 4 min read
Updated: Jan 12, 2021
This entry is about my experience with a book, at least the most memorable part of it. The book is Knife and the author’s name is so tempting to play with in catchy phrases from songs and history, I simply can’t help it. “Only Jo-o-o, can make the darkness bright”, "Jo cannot be serious", "Anything you need, Jo got it”.
Still I choose the 90’s teen hit that I am surprised to find in my memory, but since I do, I will also dare say that “I am the one and only” who has such experience with this book.
I laughed my guts out.
When I claimed the book from the local library, I was put on a queue of 32 people, so it was like true Christmas miracle to have the ‘your book is ready’-mail five weeks afterwards. I ran for it. By this time, I had seen few covers of the book in different languages and I was particularly happy that I will read the one with the best cover. (I like judging a book by its cover.)
When I shut the library door with the book in me, the traffic light was green and I crossed until the middle. Because in the middle there was a bench. “Here I am, stuck in the middle with Jo” as they sing. So, I sat there, thanked the sun for being up (people do that in Scandinavia) and started reading.
Already on the second page I get in the conversation about unrecognisable excrements in front of a hut. And my mind remembers the children’s book “Who Pooped on My Head” about the mole with this unfortunate experience that was investigating the root cause asking all the animals for poo sample. Classic and educational as it is, this children’s book brought so much colour in the minor scene, that I burst. We all know that in every journey the hardest step is the first, so when I seconds later read “so I took a picture and posted it on facebook, asking if anyone knew what is it from” another wave of laughter caught me by surprise. I imagined the very serious, emotionless, man-on-a-mission face of the person talking about it. It was hilarious.
At the same time I thought of the previous day, when the diaper of my 3-months old son leaked with poo with damage to all clothes, bedsheet, blanket and toys. The situation was so shitty that I was ramping up to hysteria, when my daughter, looking at the shape on the sheets, exclaimed “Mommy look, he has drawn Africa”. It looked remarkably like Africa, I had to admit, when I saw the yellowish shape in the little bed. Only Madagascar was missing. And my bad mood evaporated. I even sent the picture of the masterpiece to his dad, who was out of town “Look, your son drew Africa”. To which I received a reply, that made me laugh beyond reason: “What is he drawing with?”
So, there I am, on the bench in the middle of the street, beside the library, laughing like a madman, gradually losing my perception to the outer world, as my eyes water and my ears gently ring.
And someone says “Hi there”, I turn to him and see the guy who changes the nylon bag of the nearby bin. I am unable to greet him back, only laugh uncontrollably.
We first spoke few days earlier, when I was out in the neighbourhood with the pram and saw him re-filling the dogbags. And I said “Thank you for taking care of this”. He looked at me the way he would look at someone with mental disease and I started explaining: “It is really important what you do, because two days ago a lady with a dachshund was standing in utter despair in the middle of the sidewalk, unable to pick up the poo from her pet and she asked me if I had wet towels or anything. I gave her some wet wipes and a diaper and once she was done, she complained that this exact stock was empty for the first time ever. And started talking about politics and globalisation. So, as I said what you do is really important.”
He smiled, scratched his neck, said “thank you”, told me that he was moved in here, because of reported incidents. We had a friendly chat, that didn’t end up with globalisation and he continued his work whistling.
Back on the bench, he looked startled, my laughter was rather loud, I realised, and put the book in front of my face to deafen it.
“That’s totally nuts” – he said, glancing the title on the cover. – “I wouldn’t believe it, if I hadn’t seen it”.
Now that this story cannot get anymore slapstick, is the time to wrap it up, stating that this is the second book (in a row) of this series, that makes me laugh till I drop. So, I have no choice but to look forward to the next one.
And a short reference for quoted text in order of appearance:
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